Stanley Cup Playoffs Primer

Those of you who follow me on Twitter (http://twitter.com/#!/SeanofUnionBlue) know that hockey is kinda my thing. I’d tweet all day-errday about hockey if I could (and some days I have), but I know most people only follow for the poop and fart jokes. Well it’s about to get even worse, the Stanley Cup Playoffs are upon us. The only way the playoffs could be any more awesome is if my Blue Jackets could figure out a way to qualify for them again; sports hate me.

I'm asking, how can you not love this?

 Judging by the numbers, and people literally telling me, I know that most of Sports Hate Me’s readers skip through the hockey stories I write. Well this article is designed to describe and educate so you know what the hell I’m talking about when I make a Twitter joke about Joe Thornton’s propensity to disappear in the playoffs or how the Coyotes are playing out their last days in Arizona.

I won’t be making picks. That never works out well and in a league where the 8 seed has beaten a 1 seed in three of the past five seasons, it’d almost be irresponsible to attempt to predict this beast.

So here it is, your Sports Hate Me Stanley Cup Playoffs primer starting with the Western Conference. 

Vancouver vs. Chicago

Despite winning their first President’s trophy (the trophy given to the team with the best regular season record in the NHL) in franchise history, Canucks fans have to be feeling some nervousness over facing a Blackhawks squad that has eliminated them in each of the past two seasons. The Blackhawks, the defending Stanley Cup Champions, squeaked into the playoffs on the last day of the season. Their championship roster was downsized with guys like Dustin Byfuglien, Kris Versteeg, Andrew Ladd, and Ben Eager getting shipped out of town. Still, the core of Patrick Kane, Patrick Sharp, Jonathon Toews, and Marian Hossa remains intact and this team could be a dangerous 8 seed.

Vancouver has lost a ton of man-games this season to its defensive corps making their finish in the standings even more impressive. Most of their defense is coming back healthy for the run, but perhaps the biggest blow was losing former Blue Jackets’ great and faceoff wizard, Manny Malhotra to an eye injury. Also, the playoffs can be an unpredictable time when Roberto Luongo is your goaltender. Which Roberto will show up is always in question. Here's something to keep in mind though, the Canucks led the league in goals scored, goals against, and power play percentage. They're dangerous. 

Guys to Watch:

Vancouver Canucks

The Sedin Twins - Henrik won the Hart Trophy for league MVP last season and his brother Daniel could do the same this year. Their olsen-like telekinesis has to be seen to be believed.

Ryan Kesler - The former Ohio State Buckeye was 4^th in goals and a +24 all while playing under the skin of opponents. He’s an agitator with top level talent. Kesler will be an impact player in every series the Canucks play.

Roberto Luongo - Will we see the Luongo who won a gold medal with team Canada or will we see the Luongo of playoffs gone by? An improved Canucks D should help alleviate some of the pressure on Roberto.

Chicago Blackhawks

Jonathon Toews – He was the Conn Smythe winner (playoff MVP, all the NHL trophies have cool old-timey names) a year ago, and makes an impact whether he’s scoring or not.

Patrick Kane – He scored the cup clinching goal last season and is always dangerous.

Blackhawk goaltenders – Marty Turco is over the hill and hasn’t played all that much this season. Corey Crawford is untested in the playoffs.

San Jose vs. Los Angeles

This is the playoff series these two franchises have been waiting for since San Jose came into the league 20 years ago. Norcal v. Socal. The Sharks are the team with endless potential that always seems to come up short in the playoffs. They shrugged a reputation for choking in the playoffs by reaching the conference finals last season, but were promptly swept by Chicago. Neither the boys in teal nor their fans will be pleased with anything but a cup championship.

The two basically split their season series and the Kings had only two fewer wins than San Jose, but 10 of their wins came via the shootout. Playoff games don’t end in shootouts so LA will need to figure out how to win games by putting the puck in the net in normal game situations.

Guys to Watch

San Jose Sharks

Joe Thornton – a reputation for fading in the playoffs that he earned while playing for Boston and then followed him to California will loom over every game he fails to score in. Can Thornton rise above it like he did last year or regress to previous seasons’ performances?

Logan Couture – the Sharks rookie is a strong candidate for rookie of the year and scored 32 goals on the season.

Antti Niemi – Niemi won a cup with Chicago last year, but a lot of critics credited the Blackhawks victory as  being despite Niemi rather than because of him. This season however, he had a fairly strong goals against average of 2.38. Plus, Niemi will look to end the Sharks tradition of poor goaltender play in the playoffs started by Evgeni Nabakov who is no longer with the team.

Los Angeles Kings

Anze Kopitar – what’s that? He’s not playing, oh…

Drew Doughty - The 21 year old defenseman played for team Canada in the Olympics and will log big minutes for the Kings.

Ryan Smyth – I don’t think there’s a more Canadian guy in the NHL today. His nose is crooked, he’s 35 years old, he was a big part of the Oilers surprise run in 06, and he’s got some of the best flow-bucket in the game today. (Flow bucket: when long hair flows out of your helmet aka "bucket")

Detroit vs. Phoenix

 Is it possible to have nobody win this one? The Red Wings are in the playoffs for the 20th straight season. It’s almost gotten to the point where Red Wings fans don’t even watch the regular season. In Detroit the regular season is referred to as, “6 month preseason”. What is there to know about the Red Wings? Well they have solid forwards, solid defense, solid goaltending and they somehow did this all without experiencing any down years, ever. They don’t rebuild, they reload. They are extremely annoying.

The Phoenix Coyotes are in embarrassing financial straits, have been league owned for two years now, and it’s likely as soon as the season’s over they’ll be moving back from whence they came, Winnipeg, Manitoba. That’s Canada. The Coyotes built an arena in Glendale, Arizona where no Phoenixites dare venture. Their attendance is second to last in the league despite being a playoff team these last two years. If Columbus had their success, Nationwide Arena would be sold out every night. The Coyotes are extremely annoying.

Guys to Watch:

Detroit Red Wings

Nik Lidstrom – the Defenseman for the Red Wings is like 50 years old, and still a solid contributor. I wouldn’t be surprised if he played another 5 years.

Johan Franzen/Tomas Holmstrom – these guys might as well be the same player. Both Swedish, both huge, both score a ton of goals seemingly by being huge and standing in front of the net. They’re the NHL equivalent of Shaq.

Pavel Datsyuk – one of the most stunningly talented players in the game. When he’s on the ice watch him with or without the puck. He has one of the best pairs of hands the game has ever seen.

Phoenix Coyotes

Shane Doan – the Coyotes captain has played his entire career with the Coyotes/Winnipeg Jets organization. No player in the league gets more excited or is more animated with facial expressions than Doan.

Paul Bissonnette – it may be hard to watch him play as it’s likely that he’ll be a healthy scratch in most of, if not all the Coyotes playoff games, but he's worth a follow on Twitter though, http://twitter.com/#!/BizNasty2point0. Easily one of the more entertaining athlete tweeters around. 

Anaheim vs. Nashville

The Ducks have the Rocket Richard trophy winner (most goals) in Corey Perry, and an impossible to hate Finn named Teemu Selanne. Selanne is 40 years old and was supposed to retire when the Ducks won the cup in 2007, but he decided there was still enough left in the tank to keep playing for another 4 years and possibly more. The endearing thing about Selanne is how much fun he has playing the game and at freaking 40 had a 30 goal season with a lot of those goals coming as the game winner or in the last two minutes of a contest. The Ducks could be the team that makes a surprise run.

The Nashville Predators are making their 6^th playoff appearance in 12 years of existence though they’re still looking for their first series win. The Predators have gotten back to the postseason despite not having anything that resembles a number one line. The Predators beat you with depth, defense, and goaltending. Don’t be surprised if the Predators make a deep playoff run.

Guys to Watch:

Anaheim Ducks

Teemu Selanne – the guy has a knack for coming up big in clutch situations. If the game is tied late or the Ducks trail by 1, then Selanne will be on the ice.

Ryan Getzlaf – the Ducks’ captain is the definition of power forward and was the spur that kicked the Ducks to the title in 07.

Bobby Ryan – Ryan was the guy taken right after Sidney Crosby. He was 8^th in goals and had a +15 on the season.

Corey Perry – He led the league in goals, but he’s also considered one of the games biggest irritants. The league should keep a running tally to see what happens more, goals scored or times a Predators punches him in the face.

Nashville Predators

Shea Weber – The Predators captain is the defenseman every team is looking for. He’s got size, skill, and a shot that could kill a guy.

Mike Fisher – Nashville picked up Fisher at the deadline and he’s provided some scoring and is fitting in nicely with the Predators system. More importantly, he’s married to Carrie Underwood so there’s probably going to be at least one crowd shot of Underwood at one of the games in Nashville.

That’s it for the Western Conference. Expect the Eastern Conference set to be out sometime on Tuesday.



There you have it. If you agree, disagree, or have thoughts of your own. Share them with us at sportshatemeSHM@gmail.com OR follow us on twitter at http://twitter.com/#!/SeanofUnionBlue